I Laugh Till I Cry

In the past several months, here and there, I've had a couple of sad spells, thinking about how quickly Evelyn is growing up from a baby to a little girl... and how her big first birthday is just around the corner on Nov. 8.

A few times, I've made the mistake of looking back at old pictures or videos from the past 10 and a half months of her little life, and I've had to keep myself from falling out on the floor and crying like a hot mess! I have dreaded her first birthday like a child dreads the last day of summer.

But lately in the past few weeks, something has changed. Something in me is taking a turn from being sad about her growing up... and I am back to living in the moments, soaking them in, and appreciating the stage she is in now. I'm sure it has everything to do with how much she has changed in just the last few weeks. It's really astonishing.

At ten and a half months old, she has taken off with that sweet little voice of hers, talk, talk, talking! She can say, "Mama," "Daddy," "Duh-duh" (for Daisy Duddles, our dog), "Baby," "Book," "Ohhhh!" (and sometimes "Oh boy!"), "Uh oh!" "Oh no no no no," and her most favorite.... "HI!" It is adorable to listen to her talk her baby babble, and so fun to try and have a little "conversation" with her in her own little language.

The best part of her saying "HI!" is that she says it just like I do, with the exact same inflection in her voice. And, she says it with this funny, cute scrunched nose smile of hers.... I couldn't figure out where she learned to scrunch her nose every time she smiles, until the other day when Conan commented, "Apparently you've never seen the face you make when you smile at her!" 

And then I noticed, I always talk to her with that same scrunch-nosed smile. 

When she is at school, I miss the sound of her little voice. I really, really miss her and almost can't let go of her in the mornings when I take her to daycare. I sneak in a huge, cheek-to-cheek hug and kiss by the car before I take her through the front doors. (I dunno why I think I'm going to embarrass her -- or myself -- by doing it in front of the teachers -- ha!)

I think she feels the same way about leaving me, though. Every morning, Mrs. Selena or Miss Christina meets us at her classroom door, and Evelyn smiles and reaches out to go to one of them... and then as soon as she is in their arms, she gives me a grimace that says she's been duped again. "HEH!!!!!" she whines, and I have to assure her that she is going to have a good day today, just like every day, I love her, and I'll see her that afternoon.

She absolutely lights up my every day, even more so than ever before. And I could not be prouder of her friendly, kind little disposition that shows more and more lately... the way she makes other people feel so good... her family or even complete strangers. She is a bright little gift that I get to share with everyone we know, and everyone we meet. This past weekend, we visited Mom and Dad in Montgomery, and she could not stop smiling this huge goofy grin at Dad every time you turned around. All we could do was just laugh, because who knows what she was smiling up a storm about? Whenever Aunt Bunny and Uncle Jaybird, or Grammy and Pops show up at our house, she exchanges knowing grins with them -- and it's the best thing on earth to witness.

Every time I take her out in public, I can't wait to see who she will befriend. Several weeks ago, we were in Walmart, and a very intimidating, very large man with gold teeth and a hair net who was working in the meat section hunkered over near us to lay out some new meat packages. He looked like the guy from the Green Mile. I was sure Evie would burst into tears, but she smiled up so sweetly and him, and silently waved her little hand. He smiled and bellowed a, "HELLO" back at her, and she beamed. Later at the checkout, she waved "Hi!" to an older gentleman in a wheelchair. He said, "Hi there, Chicken!" Then she made the sign for "Milk" back at him, LOL.

She is just so sweet, I can hardly stand being away from her. The girl just EEKS out joy. She knows no rain or sadness, or anything really other than love and family and beauty and discovery... and FUN.

She is SO MUCH FUN, I find that lately, I LAUGH until I cry, instead of crying thinking about her growing up. Literally, the other day, she had me in stitches until I was bawling laughing...

Our little family of three was in the living room after dinner, and she and I were playing while Daddy tried to study. Ev was playing on her "Dancing Tower" which is a little game she can pull up on and hit different buttons to activate lights, music and a dancing bear. She was going to town on the tower, standing there shaking it furiously and squealing with joy, all while wearing the absolute funniest face I've ever seen -- she'd formed an O with her little lips and had both eyes WIDE open, and was just a squealing! 

I've never seen anything so funny in my life, and when Conan and I started to crack up, she just got louder and faster, and began shaking her head side to side super-fast. 

We laughed harder and harder, and the more we laughed ... the louder and faster she went, and now she was laughing herself! Just cracking up, belly laughing!

By this time, I was in stitches on the floor, holding my side and crying of laughter. I couldn't stop. The next thing I know, Ev stopped playing and crawled over to me lightening-fast, whining. She was upset that I was upset, and she crawled on to me trying to hug my neck and get me to hold her.

God love her, I had to try very hard to stop laughing.

These days, we seem to laugh that hard every single night. Whether it's because Evelyn starts a competitive game of who can say, "HI!" the loudest, or because she can't stop pointing at a picture of herself and smiling at it all cheesy, or because she has managed to devour an adult sized portion of lasagna (except for the part she wears in her hair). Everything she does is hilarious to me. When we take a bath, she gets so excited, she tries to hike her fat leg over the side of the tub before I can even finish running the water for her. If I sing a little song and bounce up and down, I can say, "YOU do it!" and she will bounce up and down on that booty and applaud herself when she's done.

TOO MUCH FUN.

Do I really get to keep her for the rest of my life?

I'm starting to plan her birthday party in 6 weeks, and I'm getting really excited about it. I hope she has an absolute ball from start to finish, and we all get to laugh till we cry a couple of times that day. 

Much more to catch you up on in regards to the past several months that I haven't blogged about... but these are my thoughts tonight as I appreciate how wonderfully and beautifully my little girl is growing up.

Love to all,

Ames

She loves her "Duh-Duh"

Bouncin' and cheerin' for Duh-Duh!

Clap clap clap your hands for a ride on Daddy's shoulders!

Hands up for a two bits!

Whatcha laughing about down there, Dada?

Never so happy as when she's covered in lasagna... 

I am oh-so-helpful to Mama with the dishes!

I really, really, really love my Aubie doll

Wrinkle nosed smile!

Games with Aunt Bunny!

Cracking up with Aunt Bunny!

I really love my Unca Jay... I have been known to call him "Mama" once or twice.

Big, emphatic kisses for all my fans...

Nummin' on my washcloth... and somehow I always sneak to the wrong side of Meme's bathtub!

Another hilarious moment -- when she learned "Touchdown, Auburn!!!" (for a cookie, of course)